What the Heck is the Enneagram?
Love who you are in the world.
Nyle DiMarco
THE ENNEA-WHAT?
The Enneagram, for those of you who haven’t heard of it yet, is a centuries-old tool for self-awareness that accurately and clearly describes why you think, feel and behave in particular ways based upon your core fears and core desires.
Like, REALLY accurately.
It’s kinda uncanny. Spooky even.
Which is WHY I LOVE IT.
But while it’s fun to learn more about our favorite subject—OURSELVES—the REAL power of the Enneagram is in its ability to harness and transform self-limiting behaviors into life-enhancing personal empowerment. This is what I LOVE about this tool—it’s not all about insight merely for insight’s sake. That type of self-awareness is, TBH, mostly just self-centered vanity. “Navel-gazing,” as former pastor of mine used to call it.
But the gift of the Enneagram is that through the self-discovery it brings, you can become a HEALTHIER PERSON who can then create and sustain MEANINGFUL AND LASTING RELATIONSHIPS with others, God, and yourself.
Which is pretty freaking amazing.
“Knowing yourself
is the beginning of all wisdom.”
Aristotle
WHAT IS THE THEORY BEHIND THE ENNEAGRAM?
The Enneagram (Ennea=9, Gram=Diagram) is simply a map (think: GPS) for self-discovery and personal growth based on 9 distinct personality types, with each number on the Enneagram denoting one type.
It is common to find a little of yourself in all nine of the types, although one of them should stand out as being closest to yourself. This is your basic enneatype.
The theory is that everyone emerges from childhood with one of the nine types dominating their personality, with inborn temperament and other pre-natal factors being the initial “seeds” of our type.
Then, as we grow and are formed by our environments—our “first formations”—we begin to also be shaped by our interactions over time with our primary caregivers and the influential people in our lives. (The “nurture” part of the “nature versus nurture” debate.)
Although our identity remains very fluid until our early 20s, we begin to establish very early on ways of understanding and fitting into the world based on both our inborn temperament and our initial formative experiences, particularly with our parents or primary caregivers. This solidifies our way of looking at and interacting with the world (our enneatype) and also molds some of the finer nuances of our typology (that we won’t delve into here).
Personality and personal identity are in some ways like co-ordinates on the same street map drawn by our intersecting relationships.
Gregory David Roberts
Some important things for you to know:
The Enneagram is a “dynamic system’’—one that recognizes that humans are far too complex and nuanced to fit easily into simple categories. It supports and encourages, then, the evolving, maturing human journey.
This tool is not a strict code. Its categories are not meant to bind or restrict people into a certain way of being and living. People who know the Enneagram in a superficial way think it’s about putting people into boxes—but that actually couldn’t be any further from the truth. It actually works to FREE people from their SELF-CREATED boxes.
It’s also important to note that while the Enneagram is a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal and/or spiritual transformation, it shouldn’t be your ONLY tool. It’s most helpful when used in conjunction with other practices like study, meditation, spiritual direction, and life in community with others.
And, finally, it’s also crucial to keep in mind that the Enneagram is not just a personality typing system. Yes, there are tests and quizzes that help you identify your primary Enneagram type, but that’s just the first step! Self-discovery, though important, it is not the Enneagram’s final objective. This tool is meant to be used as part of a life-long journey of uncovering the traps that keep us from living fully and freely as our true, authentic selves—so that we will use our unique, authentic gifts for the good of others and the world.
Personally and professionally, I use the Enneagram personality typing system as a tool for self-transformation that is able to help people grow emotionally and spiritually.
The enneagram doesn’t put you in a box.
It shows you the box you’re already in and how to get out of it.
Ian Cron
You’ll notice the original tool uses numbers to designate each of the types—this is because numbers are value neutral and imply a whole range of attitudes and behaviors of each type without specifying anything either positive or negative. They’re kinda like a shorthand, to avoid any connotations in either direction. (It’s important to know, too, that the numerical ranking of the types is NOT SIGNIFICANT. Being a One does not mean you’re somehow “first place.” It’s just a number.)
Speaking of which, you’ll notice that in this graphic, each type has been given a “NAME.” These names are NOT universal—they have been bestowed on each type by various authors over time to SUMMARIZE THE TRAITS OF THAT NUMBER’S TYPE, because sometimes people just need to put a label on something. Not every author uses the same labels, so people most often stick to numbers. These particular “names” are pretty well accepted, so I feel comfortable using them so you have an additional “handle to grasp” as you begin to understand the typology.
Now, I need you to hear this: NO TYPE IS INHERENTLY BETTER OR WORSE THAN ANY OTHER. All the personality types have unique assets and liabilities. We all have a type we wish we WERE, we all have a type we’re glad we’re NOT, and many of us may have discovered our type and said, “NO!!! Not THAT ONE!!!” (It’s actually pretty common, TBH, to feel that your type is “handicapped” in some way. As you learn more about all the types, you will see that just as each has unique capacities, each has different limitations.)
Part of this comes from the bias of our particular culture. For instance, if some types are more esteemed in Western society than others, it is because of the qualities that society rewards, not because of any superior value of those types. THE IDEAL IS TO BECOME YOUR BEST SELF, NOT TO IMITATE THE ASSETS OF ANOTHER TYPE THAT IS “MORE VALUED” CULTURALLY.
When you know and respect your inner nature, you finally know where belong. You also know where you don’t belong.
Benjamin Hoff
A few final things before we explore each type individually: First, people do not change from one basic personality type to another. As you get healthy, you begin to take on traits from the healthy parts of OTHER types, but your default way of looking at and interacting with the world remains the same. Second, the descriptions of the personality types are universal and apply equally to males and females, since no type is inherently masculine or feminine. And third, you’ll likely find that not everything in the description of your basic type will apply to you all the time because we fluctuate constantly among the healthy, average, and unhealthy traits that make up our personality type.
If you DON’T KNOW YOUR PERSONAL TYPE, here are a few free online tests I’ve found to be pretty reliable:
https://assessment.yourenneagramcoach.com/
https://www.9types.com/rheti/index.php
https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/test
https://lonerwolf.com/enneagram-test/
If you’re struggling to figure it out or want to learn more than you can gain from a simple quiz and bio, you can also work with me to determine and learn more about your typology.
Identifying our type is often painful because it is often uncomfortable to look at our “shadow side.” However, when we avoid discomfort, we miss the opportunity to grow and become new. As a certified Enneagram Coach, I look forward to utilizing this tool with you to get a good, honest look at your first formation and how it impacts you TODAY, so we can then identify the necessary steps we need to take toward the RE|formation you desire.
Your identity is your most valuable possession. Protect it.
Elastigirl, The Incredibles