You may have noticed I’m a bit of a rock hound.

If I’m out in nature, I almost always have a pocket (or four backpacks—my kids would LOVE to tell you THAT story) full of unique, nature-made TREASURES.

Rocks have traditionally been symbols of durability and strength.

But they’re also lessons in formation.

So bear with me for a moment, while I go full nerd on you.

(I promise, it will be worth it.)

There’s not a single rock that doesn’t teach us a lesson about formation: take sedimentary rocks, for example, created as fragments of other rocks are broken down by erosion, swept away, transported somewhere else, and compacted into tight layers to form something entirely different—reminding us that we all have within us a little bit of everyone around us.

Consider rock fragments or loose joints created when water seeps into an existing crack in a rock, expanding as it freezes, breaking the rock further open with each freeze/thaw cycle—teaching us that those things that repeatedly get under our skin begin to reshape us.

Think about the obvious examples— canyons or gorges—deep clefts created when a river continuously cuts through a piece of land over time, wearing away layers of rock as it goes. A lesson on the power of persistent effort over time.

Look at cliffs, usually formed by heartier rocks more resistant to weathering and erosion—likewise formed by the power of water, via either current or the relentless crashing of waves—showing us that even the strongest of habits can be worn away with enough force against it.

Or, if you REALLY want a meaningful lesson—consider my FAVORITE: the geode.

(Here’s where I go full out nerd on you.)

Geodes are roundish, hollow rocks whose cavities are lined with mineral materials. (Mineral materials=cool stuff.) They’re formed when a cavity forms in a rock—like gas bubbles or gaps in the sediment left by air pockets. Water continually filters over years through the porous outer layers, leaving behind on the inside deposits of the minerals it was carrying. (Minerals=CRYSTALS.)

Here’s the thing about geodes—unless they’ve been broken open, they look like plain ol’ ordinary rocks. They give no hint—other than their shape and location—that there is the possibility of great treasure inside.

Geodes cause us to consider that what is most beautiful about us is being formed slowly over time on the inside, not what people presently see on the outside.

How does this translate to people?

From the moment egg and sperm meet to that first major transition through the birth canal, formation has begun and, essentially, at every level down to the cellular, doesn’t end until we die. This ongoing formation—and transformation—is an inevitable process tied directly to our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual growth and development.

As all of our new, squeeky-clean life unfolds in front of us—transitions, developmental milestones, the creation of attachments, the shaping of our neurological pathways—we are beginning to form, from a very early age, the patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving that are to become the unconscious set of beliefs that shape our lives.

We’re becoming, to loosely apply my rock metaphor, “sedimentary rock.” We are being built up and compacted layer by layer—all our experiences and biology and relationships one on top of the other—and becoming something totally “other” than those around us.

But we know that even once rocks are formed, they don’t stay the same. There are forces that change them over time. That RE-form them. Rain. Wind. Waves. Heat. Ice. Current. Interaction with other elements.

And the same is true for US. Even after our critical stages of development end in our early to mid-20s, we are constantly experiencing this same re-formation throughout our entire lives—shaped by our relationships. Our roles. Our experiences. Our culture. And the way we experience our deepest emotions—fear, shame, grief, anger, and desire.

We cannot escape re-formation—no more than we can escape our “first formation.”

Here is where coaching comes in.

Transformational coaching is designed—for those who truly desire it—to help people consciously RE|form their lives at the deepest levels, not just on the surface. To tunnel below mere behavioral modifications (what we DO) and carve out deep, lasting change at the character level (who we ARE).

We do this by taking advantage of difficult, formative experiences that naturally occur in life and engaging with them in an intentional way that allows YOU to determine how they ultimately transform you and your life.